So I Saw Deadpool

So, i finally saw Deadpool. And it was good.

My Top Ten Films of 2015

It's that time of year again, where it's time for people to look back and judge everything that happened the previous year. This was actually going to be published last week, but I had one more movie I wanted to see before i made it conclusive.

So, to note, this only includes movies that I saw that were released this year. So, while I'm sure Ricki & The Flash would have been my run-away Number 1 movie, i have to eliminate it from the list.

I'm Sorry, Meryl Streep. Please forgive me

Number 10: Jurassic World

Nostalgia, Ultra

So, this actually happens to be the movie I saw the most in theaters this year, 3 viewings. Each one made me happier than the last. The callbacks to the original, the fantastic casting of Chris Pratt as Owen Grady, and the visual design of both the park and the dreaded Indominous Rex, this lands at number 10. It would be higher if it weren't for the admittedly weak plot and it's focus on the kids who honestly aren't bad, but are hogging the spotlight from Pratt. But honestly, the motorcycle Raptor chase and the final fight with the T-Rex that elicited a childlike "YES!" from me in the theater get it here no doubt.

Number 9: The Peanuts Movie

Dare to Dream

So, in a year filled with overblown action movies, a metric ton of spy movies (either actually or parody films), and whatever Ricki and the Flash is, it was refreshing to see something as simple and soothing as The Peanuts Movie. It's the kind of movie that has something for everyone. It introduces these characters that everyone has know for years and fleshes them out enough that someone who doesn't know what a Charlie Brown is can grasp everything going on. The dialogue is witty, Snoopy's dream sequences with the Red Baron are captivating, and the movie is a special kind of charm that makes other kids movies wish they could be this good.

Number 8: Avengers: Age of Ultron

Dawn of the Planet of the Ultrons

So, while i thoroughly enjoyed this movie and thought that it took what made the first movie fantastic and upped it even more, I just saw too many great movies that dwarfed this. When the first Avengers came out, I screamed to the heavens that they had finally produced a movie exclusively for me. This time, I walked out nodding in approval, but not with the enthusiasm I had for the first rodeo.

The movie is fun, raises the stakes, and introduces fun characters like Scarlet Witch and Ultron who has, without a doubt thus far, the best villain voice in the Marvel movies. The action is great, the one-liners feel more natural, the scene where they have the party at Stark's mansion is great. It's all good, it just...it had a lot of competition, okay?

Number 7: Furious 7

Mangasm: The Movie

Dwayn Johnson flexes out of a cast, rips a machine gun off of a helicopter, and shoots things while Vin Diesel knife fights Jason Stathem on the roof of a parking garage.

Number 6: Creed

Cancer sucks

In what turned out to be a self fufilling prophecy, I walked into Creed thinking that what i was going to see was the coming out party for Michael B. Jordan. And i was right. After what is regarded as one of the worst movies of 2015 (Fan4stic), Jordan was in a make or break situation. Either Creed needed to be amazing or his promising career was over.

This movie delivered in every single way. The way this movie is shot, especially during the final fight, is absolutely mesmerizing. This movie reminded me why the original Rocky got an Academy Award for Best Picture and why Sly Stalone, in all of his slurring glory, is actually a respected actor when he puts effort in. This movie was so good, I wrote a paper about it for Developmental Psychology, as the depiction of the aging Rocky Balboa synced up with the lectures in class. I was in a constant state of bliss as rings of the Rocky theme play off through the fights. The training montage, in all of it's glory, shows the kind of director that Ryan Coogler is. I look forward to Jordan's next movie, and I actually hope this gets a sequel.

Number 5: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens

Where most of you stop reading

I have to apologize in advanced, Jacob, but this movie is not my number one. Or my two. Or three...you get the point. Look, like i said with Age of Ultron, there was a lot to compete with this year. And while this movie elicited the most childlike wonder and excitement from me and completely lived up to the hype I made up for it, it just isn't my favorite this year. It is, however, my second favorite Star Wars movie, with fantastic visual effects and a great score by the always brilliant John Williams.

The story, which basically echos A New Hope, is well done and has the dark tone that Empire Strikes Back had mixed with the humor of a Marvel movie. It's well put together, well acted, well directed, and just...good. It's really good, and chances are if you saw it, you know it's good. Kylo Ren's lightsaber rivals Darth Mauls for the "Coolest Laser Sword in Movie History" award and Daisy Ridley as Ray sets a new standard for what I want in my cinema heroes. Also, BB-8 giving Finn a thumbs up is literally the best thing ever. 

Number 4: Straight Outta Compton

\

Crazy Motherf...y'know, nevermind...

A movie that surprised me and made me rethink my life (seriously), Straight Outta Compton hits that perfect note where I learned something and was entertained. What I learned is that, in the 80's, being Black in California was a crime punishable by getting the living shit kicked out of you. For anyone that doesn't believe that there were race issues (you know, the 1 person who still exists), watch this movie. The scene from the Detroit concert where the riot happened was my favorite part. And the movie as a whole is a great telling of the World's Most Dangerous Band. The actors do a great job playing the band, Paul Giamati plays what is, in my opinion, his best role to date, and the guy playing Snoop Dogg is amazing. 

It manages to be retro and modern (there's a "Bye Felecia" joke), grounded and over the top, and action packed and earnest all at the same time. It also inspired me to get back into playing and wanting to make music again, something I had been burned out from for a while. Watch the movie, listen to the music, and be changed.

Number 3: The Martian

I need to Science the shit out of this blog

So, while Star Wars was the most visually impressive Sci-Fi movie this year, this one was the most intriguing. Based off the book of the same name, it stars Matt Damon playing a sarcastic asshole botanist who must survive on Mars until someone comes to rescue him. What happens next is probably the most realistic depiction of science and space in Science Fiction film history. From the realistic reaction from the President and NASA when they find out Damon is alive to the "science" of living on Mars. The man plants potatoes on Mars!

It's all the character that drives this movie. A movie about a dude stranded on Mars could have been boring, but thanks to the excellent screenplay adaptation of the book and the return to form directing by the greatest living director, Ridley Scott, it works perfectly. Not only one of the best movies of the year, but one of the best movies I've seen.

Number 2: Mad Max: Fury Road

What a lovely day to die

In what had to be the most out of nowhere experience in films for me, Mad Max Fury Road does everything right with pretty much nothing. The story is simple: Furiosa (Played by Charlize Theron) is driving Immortan Joe's War Rig to get gasoline, but is actually smuggling hi's 5 wives out and away. Chaos insues, Max (played by Tom Hardy) drives a car with Furiosa and shit hits the fan in the most amazing way possible. It's all done with real stunts, no special effects, and that's what puts this movie here. In what is essentially a movie with two very long car chases, it manages to be interesting and fresh the whole time. There is a guy strapped to a semi truck, blindfolded, playing a flaming guitar. The whole time. 

THE WHOLE TIME!

Furiosa turns out to be the biggest badass of the entire movie, standing up to the patriachy set forth by the tyrannical Immortan Joe to free his slaves and live in peace. Furiosa and a tribe of women are responsible for the triumph in this movie, not Max, which some would say is a bait-and-switch, but i would call an excellent twist on top of an excellent movie. The only negative i can think to say is that it is a theater experience. I'm not sure the home version could have the same magic as the theater did. But boy, when I saw it in the theater, it blew my damn mind. And it still sticks with me even though this movie came out relatively early in the year.

Number 1: Inside Out

Feel Factor

This was number one the second it finished, and through every other movie I saw this year. Nothing has lived up to this movies since. This is, without a doubt, the best Pixar film every made in my opinion. From the casting of the emotions (come on, Lewis Black is Anger. It's perfect) to the plot, to Bing Bong. It's all perfect.

And, here is the thing that's gonna blow your mind. Look again at the list. Look at the names. Notice something? Like maybe that this is the only original idea on this list? The only thing that's not a sequel, an adaptation, a re-imagining, or "based on a true story" is this movie is it. The only original idea (surprisingly, he wrote sarcastically) is a kids movie by Pixar.

And it's more than a kids movie about emotions. It's a coming of age story, painting the perfect picture of feeling lost in a new place. It shows that growing up sometimes means you need to leave things behind. And that there are multiple sides to a memory. Sometimes something beautiful can make you sad. And sometimes something sad is a moment you later look back on fondly. It doesn't have the action that other movies this year, but it evoked something in me a movie had never done before. The feeling I got watching this movie can't really be described. It sparked an emotion I can't name, bringing so many memories flashing back and making me look at moments differently. Things I remember from childhood are now looked at different. That's something that Age of Ultron can't do. That's something that Star Wars can't do. And that feeling is what put this here.

Comfortably Numb: Alone On Stage

January 11th, 2009 was a day that changed a lot in my life.

It all started in October of 2008, when i saw a poster before a movie. I stopped at Coldstone Creamery because...well...it's Coldestone man, it's goddamn delicious. As i were leaving, i saw this:

The Poster

I thought to myself "Huh...Dare to Dream? $500 bucks and you get to record a song? Sure, whatever."

I asked my friend Tyler if i could borrow his acoustic guitar and if he'd give me a ride to Findlay. He said yes, and we were off. I gathered up $10 and we went. We pulled up to Coldstone Creamery and there was this little trailer there with DARE TO DREAM written across the side in big, bold, star-spangled letters. There was a woman with big, curly blonde hair and a man in a turtleneck sweater standing outside the "studio". As Tyler and I left the car, my confidence slowly fizzled out. Each step became heavier and heavier as sweat began to collect on my brow. I swerved to the right, breaking my line from going straight to the RV to instead turning right, heading into Coldstone.

The people outside the trailer followed me in...

"Hi there! We saw that you have a guitar with you. Are you going to come and record something for us?!" The woman with the big, curly blonde hair asked, behind a toothy grin, adjusting her glasses.

I silently nodded, mustering up the best grin i could, hiding my unrelenting stress. I pick up the guitar and head to the trailer. I walk in and meet with their sound engineer. He directs me into the recording room, and says "when the red light goes on, you're good to start"

The light goes on, and my fingers start their dance upon the frets. All of the stress went away as I started singing and strumming. I finished, the light went off, and i went on with my day. I got to keep a copy of the CD, which i'm sure my Mom or Grandma have somewhere around the house.

Three weeks later, i received an email from the curly haired woman saying that i was one of the finalists! I got to perform live in a mall! Just like Tiffany!

So...does anyone get this joke? No? Okay...

And this is where things start getting interesting. So, at this point i had only been playing guitar for a year or so. I'm self taught, which means that i was not only a shitty teacher, but a fairly shitty player. And, in an effort to become a better player, i opted to learn and play something bigger for the live performance. Something that had an actual backing band, something that would require me to actually LEARN something. Not just four chords. I opted to pick one of my favorite songs: Comfortably Numb by Pink Floyd. 

Anyone that knows me on a personal level knows that i have a hard time keeping myself motivated. So, instead of just keeping this live performance a me-thing, i contacted a friend named Jake and asked him to make flyers to pass out at school. I made a facebook page, i had my principal announce over the schools intercom that i was involved in this contest. I rallied my friends and family to not only vote for me to win, but to come see me play. That meant that not only would random people be there to see me, and not just my family, but my peers, who would give me shit for the rest of high school if a screwed up. Well...at least that's what was going though my mind to drive me forward.

I practiced hours on end, day after day until the day finally came in January.

I dropped of my incredibly meager gear at the stage. My starter fender amp that couldn't have had bigger than a 8" speaker in it with very low wattage and my Squire Stratocaster. I had to borrow a distortion pedal from my friend Matt because i didn't own one, and i found a backing track on the internet that i used to back me while playing. I eagerly awaited my time as the crowd gathered. My friends and even teachers started showing up, coming up to me wishing me luck.

I was the 7th person to go up on stage. My palms started sweating as my entire body started shaking. For the first time, i was alone performing. Hell, for the first time in my life i was alone, period. Despite the crowd, i was alone in my own world. The only thing i could hear was my heart beating.

The backing track started and i took flight. I felt like i was on top of the world. My hands slid up and down the fretboard, i gained confidence with every measure of the song, every drum beat. In my head, i sounded exactly like David Gilmour & Roger Waters (at once, awkwardly). 

I was once these two men...

I walked off the...well...area of floor that they called the stage to a roar of applause. At least as much as applause can roar inside of a mall. Hell, i got an applause during the middle of the guitar solo. That, my friends, is how you know you've done great. My mom, aunt, and grandma all came up to hug me and congratulate me, all of my best friends came up to me, my choir director said that i had done great. Again, i was on top of the world. 

This is pretty much how i felt, in a cat gif

As I made my way to the food court to get a lemonade, the man in the turtleneck and the woman with the big, curly blonde hair announced that the next three performers were the top three of the contest. Which meant that I lost. Which meant that all of my hard work, in my mind had gone to waste. I walked back with my overpriced lemonade, defeated. I sat for the rest of the show, being admittedly underwhelmed with the other performers. That might just be arrogance, but i felt that the reaction i got alone should have shown that i was the best. 

At any rate, as i made my way to grab my equipment and leave, a man came up to me and stopped me.

"Man, you should have won that thing! You owned that stage man, you were way better than the girl that won!" And he just went on and on. I smiled and thanked him profusely. It made me feel so good about what I had done, how I had performed. I felt free.

Years down the line, I looked back at the tape. I was horribly out of tune, i fretted some wrong notes. In short, i screwed up a lot. I am my own worst critic, and i would have given myself minus five stars (-***** for the visual person). I am completely ashamed of how it turned out, and I never talked about it. In fact, when my best friend Troy brought it up early last year, i flat out refused to acknowledge that i ever played the song.

Now, years later, I'm not only acknowledging it, but i'm embracing it. This one event taught me more about life than anything else i've experienced today. And it was just a performance at a mall.

Preparing for this taught me to stay motivated, even if it's by making up some bullshit stakes to make it happen. This is still something that i struggle with, but when i do need the motivation, this is how i do it. It taught me that, just because you work hard for something, doesn't mean you are going to get what you want. Or that things will turn out how you picture them. I imagined me on a stage, running to the edge as my friends surrounded the front, cheering me on. I also expected to win the $500 and buy some better equipment and perform on the same stage as Billy Ray Cyrus.

No, seriously, that was part of the prize

It taught me that your efforts don't go unnoticed. I have no idea if that man was just trying to make me feel better or honestly thought that i did great, but he recognized that i tried and his words made me want to keep trying to be better. And finally, it taught me to never forget the past, but to let it go too. I felt fantastic after i performed, terrible when i lost, and i never wanted to play again after i heard the recording. I had a sense of failure that took months to shake, 

If i had stayed in that rut, i probably would not have sought out all of the musical ventures I have been through. There is no Viking Choral (aka varsity choir), there is no Easy Target or Your Chosen Enemy (two bands i played in during high school and freshman year of College), and no Rhythm and Roos (an A Cappella group i was King* of for a while)

Pictured: My loyal subjects

So, what's the point of all this? Why write about what is essentially an embarrassing performance where I didn't live up to my expectations? Was it just to talk about my emotions like some teenager with a Tumblr account?

Well, I already talked about how it taught me about life. But more importantly, it's relevant to the time of year. It's a new year, and a lot of people are entering into a "New Year, New Me" attitude. And sometimes, it comes from a year that has not been the best to them. I am one of those people, and I am looking to make this year less 50/50 on the scale of good to bad and more on the good side of the scale. This doesn't need to mean self improvement, maybe it's just getting in some routine.

The point is, you dictate your life. Set your goals and do what you can, and if last year wasn't your year, make it this year. Learn from the past, and turn it into something positive. Push forward, and don't let your failures stop you from bettering yourself

And here's a closing inspirational quote on a picture

The Lesson Plan

The following post was the final essay for my Sociological Social Psychology class, in which i was giving an open monologue to start off a class. It's a fun little story that i feel a lot of people who don't work in retail or behind a counter interacting with people all day could really appreciate.

The Lesson Plan

          I work in what has to be the most small-time, person-centric setting there is. I am a cashier. But not at a retail store or at a supermarket, I work at Sheetz. Sheetz is a convenience store, where people expect to be served quickly, and then get the hell out of there. Nobody stands around to make conversation. Hardly asks you how your day is going. They just do not care. And it is terrible sometimes. Sometimes I leave work completely drained by the lack of compassion some people have. I have been berated for gas pumps not having paper in them, like the receipt that they are going to take home and throw away anyway is a life or death situation. I have had people complain to me about the price of cigarettes going up and up and up as if I am some mystical price wizard who has set out to destroy their bank account. I have had a lady stand over me, literally hunched behind my back watching me brew a pot of coffee that she wanted. It blows. 

       Sometimes.

       No matter how much the people get me down at the job, even on my worst days, I put on the smile and the happy voice. I always greet my customers with the at this point automatic “How’s it going?” or “What can I do for you today” depending on if they have stuff at the counter with them. The normal response to the former is “pack of Marlboro Red.” The normal response to the latter is “A pack of Marlboro Red.”  About three week ago, I was having an awful day. I was dreadfully stuck behind the register for my entire shift. Nine long hours alone to deal with these types of responses all day. My morale was pretty low, but finally a guy came in around my age with his girlfriend. He was polite and sarcastic, so I was being polite and sarcastic back. Suddenly, his girlfriend looks at him and asks “Do you have your Sheetz card?”, a question I had neglected to ask.

        “Yeah,” he said, “I do. Hey buddy, why didn’t you ask if I had it?”

        “She asked before I got the chance!” I said, with a joking manner.

         “Yeah, but it’s your job” he retorted, smiling at me.

         “Yeah, but I’m not gonna complain if someone does it for me” I said back. He snickered, I handed them their receipt and they walked away. We get busy about 20 minutes later, so one of the managers comes up front to help me ring people out. After it's over, she turns to me and asks me if I am okay. I say yes, just a little tired, and she says:

        “Well, I’m just asking because a customer complained that you were rude to them at the counter.”

        I thought to myself: which one of these bastards could it have been!? It had been a pretty normal day, and nobody really stood out as someone I had been rude to. It turns out, it was the guy I thought was joking around with me. Apparently, he was not picking up on my social queues and thought I was being serious. I couldn’t believe it. I was even more demoralized than when the day had started.

        Later in the evening, an older woman, maybe 60 years old or so, came into the store. I did the usual asking how her day is, and she opened up a bit. She said she was running all over the place working to get her house in order for Christmas coming up. She said this was going to be the first time all year she has gotten to see her grandkids. I said that that all sounded exciting. She bought a pack of cigarettes and two large coffees for her and a friend. Her friend called right after I rang her up and suggested that she get extra-large coffees. It had been a long day for me, so when she asked how much it would cost to upgrade I said she could just have the extra-larges. She thanked me and I went about my business.

          I was unfolding bags for the restaurant portion of the store when the same woman came back up to me. “Sir, I hate to bother you,” she said, “but I can’t seem to get these cups out”. I hopped out from behind the counter and pulled the cups out for her and went back to my business. No big deal, right?

        “Sir”, she called again, “do you have any drink carriers? My hands are a little full”. I said yes, and again hopped out from behind the counter to grab the carrier for her. I then returned and started stocking cigarettes. That has my back turned to the store, and gives me the slightest privacy I have. I take a sip of my drink quickly and then I hear behind me “Sir, I hate to be a pain, but…”

         I turned around to see her with the cups in the carrier. I thought, what else could she possibly need? “I can’t seem to get these lids on the cups. I’m terribly sorry, but I don’t want to spill anything. Can you give me a hand?” I smiled and said sure, and put the lids on. She said “You know, you are the most polite person I’ve ever seen working at a place like this. Can I tip you?” It was such a surreal sentence to hear, especially after having hundreds of people just walk through the store ignoring you day to day.

        “Are you sure you want to tip me?” I said, “I’m just doing my job”

        “No, your job is to ring people out so they can get on with their day.” She said, “you don’t have to help anyone. You did it out of the kindness of your heart, and that is rare these days. So yes, I would very much like to tip you.”

       She handed me $3.00, which was what I normally got delivering pizzas in high school. She thanked me over and over again as she left the store with a smile on her face. All the while, I just stared at the money, dumbfounded that anyone even recognized me trying to do anything. While most people are funneling through this place, eyes to the ground ignoring their surroundings, there this lady was noticing me. Sometimes it really is the little stuff that people appreciate. It’s the things that normally go thankless and because of that, not many people even bother doing them. After she left, the manager came up to me and said “You see Dean, that’s why I have a hard time believing that guy earlier. I don’t think a lot of people that work up there would have done any of that for that lady. You are too caring to be rude to people.”

       From then on I have tried to keep the mentality of how I felt when that woman thanked me. I saw how someone else reacted to my actions and thought that maybe, just maybe, I would have another really gratifying experience like that. That, even in this job I have for now, I can still make a difference. I mean, that’s why we’re here right? In this job field, as psychologists, sociologists, nurses…whatever else you want to be that you’re taking SSP? We want to understand the world and with that understanding make it better. I know I’ve gone long, and class has a lot to cover today, I wanted to share this story because it is important that you, no matter what cog in this society that you are, are important, whether you know it or not. Your smallest actions can have big consequences, sometimes reactions that you don’t even see coming. Be kind, be attentive, and above all be yourself. You will be surprised what can happen.

…So, moving on with unit IV….